Monday, February 16, 2004

Now that the no-call list keeps the debt-consolidation turds off of my answering machine, I've noted a considerable upswing in telephone surveying. I've been surveyed more often in the few months since the no-call list came into existence, than in the rest of my life combined. Usually, it's some sort of marketing survey. I have been surveyed about new sport programming, shampoo, and erectile dysfunction drugs. I've been surveyed about my political opinion on government subsidies of medical research (against them, in a general sense). It's become a fairly interesting addition to my home-life, which tends to be otherwise quite bare due to my hermit-like lifestyle.

This weekend, it was my opinions on marriage. Which was rather awkward, due to my hermit-like lifestyle, and monkish lack of a sex life. It occurred to me in the course of this survey that my profile would just scream "confirmed bachelor", to use the old euphemism. So, since this was very much on my mind, I kept waiting for the questions about homosexual marriage, especially as we tip-toed through the "civil union" minefield.

The survey ended without a single mention of the words "gay", "homosexual", or euphemisms along those lines. Nothing. Lots of questions about what I thought about women, and the cost of weddings, and premarital sex, and, of course, civil unions. ('gainst 'em, by the way.) They asked what I thought of the government setting up expensive marriage-encouragement education programs. (Against such things.) Whether I thought that couples that had children should get married. (Hell, yes!)

No "what is your sexual orientation" question. No question about what I thought of the idea of homosexual marriage. (Rather for it, I think, if you were wondering) No mention of homosexuality whatsover. I can't imagine what the hell was the point of this bizarre survey, which asked every goddamn thing on the subject but the *CORE ISSUE ITSELF*.

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